Curtis guides us through the dark, secret, lucrative village of kidnapped and forsaken cars, in search of the shiny valiant Jetta. (5 mins.)

By Wendy Jo Carlton, Brenda Schumacher and


City of Chicago reaps $10 million yearly by holding cars hostage


click for the city’s new cameras that will find you even faster!

If you choose to own a car, and then perhaps even drive it, do not park it. Just pay a companion to ride with you to run your errands, do your shopping, and make your doctor visits. Companion drives around while you pick up peanut butter, or open wide. Companion may also pull over and idle car at a park, church, parking lot, cemetery, until you are ready to be picked back up. This way, your car will never again get ticketed for expired meter, loading zone, sudden snow in a snow lane, etc.

It’s also worth noting that paying $18-27 for a paid parking lot or garage is much much better than fooling yourself that you’ll just be half an hour at your optometrists office, as the meter is only good up to half an hour, and inevitably, the doctor runs late and when you return in 39 minutes, you have a $50 ticket on your sad sad windshield. It then turns into $100 in just 7 days and next ya know, the city wants hundreds of dollars of your hard earned cash because of a few dinky meters time expired while you were dropping loads of $$$$ into the Chicago economy by shopping or being serviced, plus the hundreds more in city sales taxes, which are nearly 9%…

Juicy Planet strongly believes that current city policies are unfair and unethical. Currently, if you have just 3 unpaid parking tickies, the city legally (not morally) will BOOT and then TOW your property. Then, assuming you want the car back, you cannot pay anything online, but must go to the DMV. If you don’t have enough money, you can apply for a hardship payment plan, plus cough up $250 cash, before your property will be released. If you are not a student, unemployed, or receiving social services (and can prove it), you will not get your car back, the city will sell it, and you have no recourse. This is about parking tickets, not drunk driving, not speeding, not manslaughter…We wonder what happens then.